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Old 02-09-2007, 08:01 PM   #61
Oleg
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After getting out of the tub, I just stared at it, not wanting to scoop it out.
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yo if tocamget a G For a foreme legend. thatd be a stoei to tell. youre chill meh. heklp .e out find a g


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Old 02-09-2007, 08:02 PM   #62
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hahha you win.
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Old 02-09-2007, 08:16 PM   #63
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I was riding my bike downtown when I got "the urge". I must have been 15 at the time, so it was easily 11-12 years ago. But yeah, I did the old "sit on your heel" thing to keep everything in place, but... damn.

I did the "I just shit on myself" limp/walk to a pizza joint/metal venue about two blocks away and did away with my underwear in their toilet. I swear it must have taken me 20-30 minutes to clean up all of that doodoo. And you know my ass was beet red from all that chaffin' on the way. Awful.


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and yea, adrianwar started out as failing... but has redeemed himself IMO. n00bs should take note that it IS possible to release yourself from reject limbo by the creation of a thread such as this.
I'll stick to being a n00b with a severe masturbation problem.
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Old 02-09-2007, 08:21 PM   #64
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I was sitting in lens crafters waiting for my friend to get glasses when I was reading this...and I started laughing out loud in front of a bunch of people...

This was one of the funniest things I've read in a long time
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Old 02-09-2007, 08:23 PM   #65
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I'll stick to being a n00b with a severe masturbation problem.
nah, you know stuff about guitars and shit... you're tight.
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METRONOME.

try using it.
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BZM, you embody coolness, hahaha!!!
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Old 02-09-2007, 08:30 PM   #66
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I showed mom thread. She told me when i was a kid, i'd make this puckered up face in kmart, take off running. You know those circular clothe racks that have a space on the inside? Well umm yeah, apparently that's where i did my business.
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Old 02-09-2007, 08:32 PM   #67
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I'm starting to wonder if adrianwar killed himself.
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Old 02-09-2007, 08:58 PM   #68
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hahha you win.
No my friend's brother wins. I heard when he was about three, (remember, being bathed by his mother) that he took a shit in the bath by accident, got a fright, lifted it up, and hurled it across the room where it splattered all over the wall. Poor mother must have been traumatised.
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Old 02-09-2007, 09:05 PM   #69
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I was in the pool at the hardrock hotel in orlando and I was just swimming along minding my own business, then I look down, and saw a nice little leaf a floatin. So I went to scoop out the little leaf and then after it was in my hand I had realized it was not a leaf and indeed a piece of shit.

I must of washed my hands for an hour straight.
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Old 02-10-2007, 03:31 AM   #70
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who the fuck reaches into a pool to pick up a leaf?
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fuck you.

no, you.
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I'm pretty sure the sound of Mason's fist busting that kids jaw was one-of-a-kind, just like he is.
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this nigga said catlace.
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I'm sure he's not really worried. Mason is as far from a faggot as you can get. Mason's fucked hotter.
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Old 02-10-2007, 05:22 AM   #71
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I was in the pool at the hardrock hotel in orlando and I was just swimming along minding my own business, then I look down, and saw a nice little leaf a floatin. So I went to scoop out the little leaf and then after it was in my hand I had realized it was not a leaf and indeed a piece of shit.

I must of washed my hands for an hour straight.
thats fucked up man!!!!
When I was like 10 years old, I swam behind one of those little fucking waterfall grotto type things at the hard rock las vegas and there was a solid logashit just chillin there! FUCK THAT! FUCK HARD ROCK!

110/10 thread.
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Old 02-10-2007, 05:58 AM   #72
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Not really shit related, but I remember going down to this swimming pool and they had to get everyone out of the pool because a huge group of drunk guys pissed and dumped buckets of piss in it, making the water turn purple.
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Old 02-10-2007, 08:34 AM   #73
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When I was a junior in high school, I witnessed a freshman shit his pants while going for an overhead at the net (lol, tennis). The shit just splattered all over the fucking tennis court, and all I could do was laugh uncontrollably.
Pics or it didn't happen
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BEIJING--A 17-year-old boy in northeastern China was so disappointed with the looks of a woman he met over the Internet that he hanged himself after seeing her face-to-face
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Old 02-10-2007, 08:47 AM   #74
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After getting out of the tub, I just stared at it, not wanting to scoop it out.
Holy shit!

This thread wins \o/

100/10
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BEIJING--A 17-year-old boy in northeastern China was so disappointed with the looks of a woman he met over the Internet that he hanged himself after seeing her face-to-face
http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/breakin...ticle_id=41820


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Old 02-10-2007, 09:37 AM   #75
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Dude when I was like 12, I got rediculously sick. I had diahrea and I was nausous so I was taking a shit, and I grabbed a bowl to puke in. Well I was done shitting, so I flushed, wiped my ass and left. I left the bucket there because I knew Id be back. So about 10 minutes later I gag and so I run into the bathroom, skid on my knees to the bowl, throw up like a gallon of puke and I guess the pressure made me shit. I turned around and there was fresh diahrea on my bathroom wall. It was awesome, I was proud.
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Old 02-10-2007, 11:48 AM   #76
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Me and my friend went out into this forest in the middle of winter a few years back. We were a half mile from any civilization and in the snow that is a long walk. Well my friend had to shit so he goes around this little bush and tells me to turn around. So I was like alright be quick. So then he shouts some crazy word and throws a snowball at me. It turns out he used the snowball to wipe his ass.
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Old 02-11-2007, 12:53 AM   #77
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^LOL
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Old 02-11-2007, 01:27 AM   #78
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So...


Where is the starter of this thread?
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"Welcome to the BTBAM forums, where the fans talk about masturbating to 14 year old girls on the Disney network!"

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I got kicked out of the theatre during opening weekend of LOTR for getting a handjob.
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call the fbi
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Old 02-11-2007, 02:31 AM   #79
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lolololzzzzerrr...fuck dude my stomaches hurtin...my head hurts from thinking about it...funniest shit...ever.
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Old 02-11-2007, 03:30 AM   #80
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So...


Where is the starter of this thread?

hes out shitting
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Old 02-11-2007, 03:31 AM   #81
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Not really shit related, but I remember going down to this swimming pool and they had to get everyone out of the pool because a huge group of drunk guys pissed and dumped buckets of piss in it, making the water turn purple.


HOLY FUCK; WIN!
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-reading/enjoying really girly (shojo) manga
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Old 02-11-2007, 02:10 PM   #82
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haha on the topic of shit.... my friend told me of a college story about his drunk room mate passing out in some chicks bed. needless to say he shit all over the place, but luckily woke up before the chick, he then preceeded to wipe some of the shit in the girls underwear so she herself would think she did it, pretty smart imo.
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when i went to blow the mixture of being nervous and being slightly drunk was enough to cause me to suck instead of blow.
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Old 02-11-2007, 02:16 PM   #83
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^ hahhahahahaha.
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Old 02-11-2007, 02:17 PM   #84
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haha on the topic of shit.... my friend told me of a college story about his drunk room mate passing out in some chicks bed. needless to say he shit all over the place, but luckily woke up before the chick, he then preceeded to wipe some of the shit in the girls underwear so she herself would think she did it, pretty smart imo.
sounds alot like a Tucker Max story.
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Shinedown > Converge

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I can't wait to grab a kid by the crotch!
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Old 02-11-2007, 02:19 PM   #85
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haha i'm not sure what tucker max is. but if my friend just heard it from something else and said that to gain some respect and a few LOL's i wouldn't doubt it.
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when i went to blow the mixture of being nervous and being slightly drunk was enough to cause me to suck instead of blow.
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Old 02-11-2007, 02:26 PM   #86
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I couldn't remember the exact story, but you should read these. They are fucking hilarious.

http://www.tuckermax.com/
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Shinedown > Converge

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I can't wait to grab a kid by the crotch!
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Old 02-11-2007, 11:25 PM   #87
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bump this shit!


i had a baseball coach in high school that told us a great shit story from one of his co-workers at his other job. the guy and his wife were kinda kinky in bed and whatnot and decided to try anal beads. the guy puts them in his wife's ass, takes them out, no problems. well she puts them in his ass, and she pulled them out to fast and as the guy says (he has a stuttering problem) "i sh-sh-sh-sh-sh-shit-shit all over her f-f-f-f-aacceee." i almost died laughing upon hearing this shit story.
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Hey, do you guys know what kind of pants Paul wears when on stage. I just really like his tone (especially on Alaska), and I want to get as close to that as I can when I sit in my room and play BTBAM songs by myself.

Thanks,
Nooby McNoob Noob
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Old 02-11-2007, 11:28 PM   #88
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Unhappy

Stop bumping this. I want to forget that day.
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Old 02-11-2007, 11:30 PM   #89
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Stop bumping this. I want to forget that day.


Your not dead!


*huggles*


But your not looking forward to tomorrow huh?
Going back to school with the people who saw the funniest thing to ever happen.
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"Welcome to the BTBAM forums, where the fans talk about masturbating to 14 year old girls on the Disney network!"

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I got kicked out of the theatre during opening weekend of LOTR for getting a handjob.
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call the fbi
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BTBAM SMN: we're experts at everything.



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Old 02-11-2007, 11:46 PM   #90
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Stop bumping this. I want to forget that day.
haha, my bad. the stories are too funny to let it die.
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Hey, do you guys know what kind of pants Paul wears when on stage. I just really like his tone (especially on Alaska), and I want to get as close to that as I can when I sit in my room and play BTBAM songs by myself.

Thanks,
Nooby McNoob Noob
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